Meaning-making

I recently had a good friend tell me that she feels like she has everything in her life she’s ever wanted. The perfect partner, the house, the job, the dogs, the friends.

So, what do we do when there’s nothing left to wish for?

My response was to keeping dreaming, even bigger. There’s no lack of space to keep growing.

I thought about this conversation again when I arrived at the farm where I volunteer, later than usual, this past Saturday.

It has been challenging to maintain my regular Saturday morning volunteer shift since signing on in January. But the animals and the community keep me coming back.

On Saturday, I arrived at the farm in the late afternoon, despite the rain and dubious forecast. I pulled on my West Coast rainjacket (which barely keeps me warm, or dry) and my new waterproof farm boots. I drove 35 minutes south, as I do every Saturday, thinking it would be a quick trip.

At the gate, I was asked if I was here for the wedding. My answer was: I’m here for the goats.

The security guard looked dismayed, but let me through.

I arrived just in time for the afternoon donkey feeding. The groundskeeper, who is a badass 30-something woman (and fast friend) asked if I would help soothe one of the goats while she clipped her hooves. This particular goat has arthritis, so it is more uncomfortable for her than the others. There are 20+ goats on the farm.

I marveled, as I always do, at the immensity of undertaking it is to care for each and every animal, to ensure they receive the daily food, water, grooming, pen-cleaning and love and attention each needs and deserves. Some animals are rescues - surrendered by overly-ambitious owners during the pandemic or from slaughter houses - others were born on the farm and don’t know any other home.

The tree-lined property with daily visitors of young families and children coo-ing and feeding them leaves through the fence is a novelty, and likely a momentary reprieve from their screen-filled, busy lives.

After helping with donkey and goat duties, I headed over to the “bachelor pad,” where two male goats are housed separately - since they still have their horns and can be a danger to the others.

Determined to get in and get out, and onto “the rest of my life” (aka at home by myself, watching bad TV) I quickly cleaned up their stall, refilled their water bucket and gave them each a few pets.

Before I knew it 30 minutes had passed. I found myself hand feeding the more timid goat, Gregory (formerly known as Zac Efron) while Arnold, clearly the alpha male, balked to deter him from the hay feeder.

The longer I stayed, the more cuddles and kisses I received. I cleaned up their stall, gave a little extra TLC, and realized I was no longer in such a hurry...

I thought, “I’ll make a quick stop over to the goat pasture to see how they are doing, then I’ll head home.” I cleared their pasture, changed a few more water buckets, and before I knew it, I was surrounded by a group of six or seven goats crowding me with affection, asking pets and cuddles.

As a semi-weekly volunteer, it has been sweet to watch the animals become familiar with me and take notice of my return. Their trust is earned.

No longer concerned with the passing time, my last stop was to say goodbye to the four donkeys in the barn. Annie hogged my attention, Junior wasn’t sure and cowered as I reached for him. With patience and stillness, he soon made his way over. The two dwarf donkeys were chilling in their stall, and gratefully accepted nose pets as I departed.

All the while, an extravagant wedding was kicking off on the farm grounds under a large white tent, adorned with hay barrels and greenery. I noticed as wait staff ran to and fro with hors d’oeuvres in their hands and stressed looks on their faces. I smiled to myself, muddied but joyful nonetheless.

I thought about the 10 or so wait staff serving a party of humans, while just little old me served over 20 goats, two cows and four donkeys. The thought kept my smile lingering.

I noticed my heart swell with gratitude - and meaning.

I looked at the clock, over two hours had passed.

I remembered back to the past several years of alone-ness and struggle, and my smile persisted. Viscreally aware of the life I have created and how I have found beauty in the mundane.

This, I thought, is meaning-making.

Despite my initial rush to “get in and get out,” I realized my rush would have prevented me from feeling the fulfillment I now felt. I thought of my friend expressing contentment in her own life. And felt the power we all have to create the life of our dreams - even if it strays from the picture we’ve seen in the movies, or the life others wish for us.

Meaning-making comes in many forms. For me, it’s all about belonging - and fulfillment knowing I am being of service to others (even animal others).

However, you choose to spend your time, I invite you to explore where and how you find meaning. There is meaning and gratitude to be had when we open ourselves to it.

  • When have you felt most grateful lately?

  • When do you feel most connected to yourself, to others, and to Nature?

  • How might you be able to prioritize your time (shuffle your schedule or set new boundaries) to ensure that the things that bring you meaning are regularly present in your life?

Moments of meaning propel us through inevitable times of hardship. Remembering to actively cultivate meaning allows blessings to flow in ways we couldn’t imagine.

I would love to hear from you! Feel free to reply, and share a moment you created that filled you with meaning and gratitude. And keep it coming…

Looking forward.

With Love and gratitude,

Amy